Thursday, November 29, 2007

It Is Finished


Yes, last night I finished off the last of the Thanksgiving Turkey. As many of you are aware, turkey leftovers are like a television camera: they add ten pounds. We had a lot of people over for Thanksgiving, and we had a lot of food. We also had lots of leftovers. The Lovely Mona is a raw food vegetarian, so the turkey leftovers held no appeal for her. Señorita Chompita Wiggletail was very interested in the turkey, but, alas, she, too, is on a raw food diet. So, the bulk (ha ha ha) of Thanksgiving Leftover Consumption was left to me. I had many plans for many interesting turkey-based meals, but for some strange reason this did not take place.
Here is how the turkey was consumed: Friday, turkey sammiches for lunch (I loves me the turkey sammich, just like Jesus ate), and turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and cashew gravy for dinner. Saturday, turkey sammiches for lunch, and another dinner of turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and cashew gravy. Sunday I was feeling stuffed so I avoided any turkey at lunch. However, the Call of the Turkey Sammich took over by dinner. Monday, turkey sammiches, Tuesday, turkey sammiches; Wednesday, turkey sammiches. Last night I had planned to make turkey tacos with the last of the turkey, but alas and alack, I had no tortillas. Thus, turkey sammiches. Many salads shall be consumed between now and Christmas.

And now, the Hymn of the Leftovers.
Tune: Rockingham

Thank God, the turkey now is gone
The sammiches have been consumed
We now must weigh about a ton
The bathroom scale is not amused.

Refrigerator now has room
Its shelves suddenly leftover free
I now have found that bag of 'shrooms
A science project they now be

A new regime is now begun
A walk each morning I will do
All bread and processed foods now shun
Or I shall be a Tub of Goo

6 comments:

Paul said...

The People have been fed. Thanks be to God. Mil gracias por el himno tan amable, Padrecito. [My leftover portion only lasted two days and I was very sad to see the last bite of turkey disappear.]

And now we return to working for the day when none go hungry.

susan s. said...

I had to run to the Hymnbook to find the tune! You people and your blasted hymn tunes. But I must say it fits really well. I love the way the words 'not', 'they' and 'Tub' rise gently on the notes....Very good meter.

Padre Mickey said...

susan s. wrote: You people and your blasted hymn tunes.
And you, a soprano!

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Anonymous said...

After making turkey, mashed potato, and greens fried dumplings last night, I bagged up EIGHT servings of turkey and stuffed them in the freezer, from whence they won't emerge until probably the new year.

Caminante said...

So you had a little bit of the Turkey Trots?

I don't think I will ever sing Rockingham in quite the same innocence as before. Muy bien hecho.

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