Friday, August 24, 2007

Friday Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging

I apologise for getting this up late, but I had trouble coming up with an idea (I'm sure THAT'S obvious) and then, once inspired (or what passes for inspiration around here) Señorita Chompita Wiggletail saw the camera come out and she hid Mr. Chompita's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy!! But, the show must go on!

Well, the big news in the World Wide Anglican Communion gossip mills Blogs was all about letters. That's right, Episcopal Correspondence! Someone found a letter on a public computer at the meeting place of the Windsor Bishops and sent it to Faddah Mark Harris. A "Short Version" of the letter, discovered by the shadows of Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito's comb, is illustrated below. (Gallito Mescalito is VERY upset to hear the rumour that the bishops were sacrificing chickens to Vishnu at Camp Allen).

¡¡¡SHHRRRIIIIEEEEEKKKK!!!

Then there was the controversy regarding A Most Agonizing Journey, a letter from Archbishop Peter Akinola to the Synods of the Church of Nigeria, which should be subtitled As Told To the Rt. Rev. Marty Minns.
This kinda stuff can make us sad, it can make us despair for reconciliation, and it can make us angry, but here at Padre Mickey's Dance Party, it makes us want to sing!!!
The Letter With Apologies to the Box Tops



Gimme a ticket for an aeroplane,
Ain't got time to take a fast train.
Goin' to Nigeria, or maybe it's Virginia,
'Cause some bishop just a-wrote me a letter.




I don't care how much money I gotta spend,
Gots to get away from them gays again
Goin' to Nigeria, or maybe it's Virginia,
'Cause some bishop just a-wrote me a letter.



Well, he wrote me a letter
Said I couldn't live with dem heretics no mo'.
Listen mister can't you see I got to get back
To dem Donatists once a-mo'--anyway...



Gimme a ticket for an aeroplane,
Ain't got time to take a fast train.
Goin' to Nigeria, or maybe it's Virginia,
'Cause some bishop just a-wrote me a letter.



Well, he wrote me a letter
Said I couldn't depend on the Creeds no mo'.
Instead it's got ta be an unequivocal acceptance
and commitment to letters a through h, ohhh--anyway


Spoken
a. The Authority and Supremacy of Scripture.
b. The Doctrine of the Trinity
c. The person, work and resurrection of Jesus the Christ
d. The acknowledgement of Jesus as Divine and the One and only means of salvation
e. The Biblical teaching on sin, forgiveness, reconciliation, and transformation by the Holy Spirit through Christ.
f. The sanctity of marriage.
g. Teaching about morality that is rooted and grounded in the Biblical Revelation.
h. Apostolic Ministry
From Now On!!!! YEAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!



Gimme a ticket for an aeroplane,
Ain't got time to take a fast train.
Goin' to Nigeria, or maybe it's Virginia,
'Cause some bishop just a-wrote me a letter.
Yeah, some bishop just a-wrote me a letter
Yeah, some bishop just a-wrote me a letter

24 comments:

Matthew Hubbard said...

See my explanation of why youse is cooler than me in today's Random 10, which explains a lot about why this truly was inspiration.

June Butler said...

Padre Mickey, it's your usual brilliant stuff - making up for my earlier unkindness.

Of course, you do realize that your song will resonate only with those of us who have been following the LETTERS shenanigans. Because of that, I'm afraid it may have limited appeal and not get you the gold.

And I notice that Fr. Jake has now put in place comment moderation. He must be getting some bad stuff.

Caminante said...

BRILLIANT!!!!! What a laugh. It's a keeper.

Caminante said...

A PS... I cranked up Joe Cocker's version thereof on iTunes. Yeah.

Padre Mickey said...

HA! I forgot about that version, but now it's playing in my head.
When your comment came in iTunes was playing a song by Big Star, which had Alex Chilton, a member of the Box Tops, the band who did the original version. Synchronicity!

Dale said...

This is great - and funny! Thanks for the humor!

valentino said...

Yes, but wait, there must be a mistake-o...isn't this the last train to Nigeria y o? Dah, dah, dah...dum, dum, de dum...I gotta catch that train because it's mov'n fast away from the stat'n(s) and I don't wanna miss heav'n and the slow boat way down South to the promis'd land-o...I'm dang near scared outta me ever'lov'n mind-o with all them threat-os, threatos of fear, hate and pontificate...save me from me, save me from me higher self and put me back on the shelf...take'n a train to scape them thar friggin los heretic-o's! Oh me, the oh me woooes, oh me wooes, doing the Akinolan polka...tick tick!

Ole'

johnieb said...

I shake. I quake. Big Pete is out and pronouncin' & denouncin' and he's surely comin' after me.

Oh dread.

Paul said...

Fabulous harmonies, gang. I think I am falling in love with the Egyptian Hippo of Love, but then one would, wouldn't one? How could one not?

Keep on singin' and dancin' - therein lies salvation. (I don't understand the types who think salvation lies in doctrine; silly folks.)

Lisa Fox said...

This is truly inspired work. Many thanks!

KJ said...

This is so clever, I'm left to conclude that it was ghostwritten by the Lovely Mona.

Anonymous said...

A member of the KKK or any White Supremicist Group couldn't have written a better ditty!
Who was your ghost writer, Don Imus?

Jim

Mary Ellen said...

I just found your blog from FranIAM-I just love it. How can I not love a blog with a stylin' rooster, surprised cat and very happy blue hippo? The song is a riot...but now it's going to be going through my head when I'm at Mass this morning. I wonder if they might consider adding it to our list of hymns today?

I'll be checking around again...great blog!

Fran said...

Oh Padre Padre Padre... Your never cease to amaze and amuse with these.

I love it.

KJ said...

Uh, Jim,

Anyone who thinks this dust up is about race, is just not paying attention.

Padre Mickey said...

Well Jim, I'm sure you've checked out this site and that's how you came to the realization that I'm a White Supremicist; it's so obvious, don't cha think?
Just the photos of the congregation of San Cristóbal will reveal that fact.

Anonymous said...

Dear padre:

Oh, now I get it, some of your best friends are minorities. Sorry that your words didn't show that.

Jim

Padre Mickey said...

Oh, Jim! I'm actually the minority at my congregation. Actually, some of my best friends are majorities!

So, what you seem to infer is that if I mock the letter of Bishops Akinola and Minns, I am some kinda racist guy, right? I don't think Nigerians are smart enough to damn everyone to hell or something?

Did I make fun of your bishop and hurt your feelings? I apologise. I thought I was making fun of an incident but you've found me out for the terrible racist jerk I am.

Padre Mickey said...

Hey Jim, you're not going to send all your friends over here to clog up the comments or fill the comments with long, boring essays on the dangers of homosexual activity, are you? Because we already had a guy like that here and he bored everyone and I will be forced to block you ip.
So, be offended, but don't be goofy.
YBIC,
El Padre

KJ said...

Padre,


Silly, silly, silly.

Why wasn't Jim offended by my "ghostwriting" comment, since by the same illogic, I was being sexist, given my assumption that you would require female assistance to create humor so clever.

Of course, you would be nothing without the Lovely Mona, but that is a topic for another day.

Anonymous said...

Bp. Akinola and other like bishops face more danger and threats in a day than most American bishops will face in a lifetime of ministry.
That said, I will take your invitation to leave your site.
As a two-year AMiA member, after a 59-year membership (from birth) in the Episcopal Church, I have demonstrated that I don't stay where I am not wanted.
Have your little gloat party all by yourselves.
I'm just trying to bring a little civility to the debate and your little song was uncivilized and frankly, unChristian.

Jim

Padre Mickey said...

Well Jimbo, as you well know, there is nothing as civil as accusing folks of racism! That always brings civility to the conversation. I don't think you actually read the song, you simply reacted.

Padre Mickey said...

What the heck does the safety of Bishop Akinola have to do with the discussion? Nothing, of course. I don't think you can have a conversation if you have no idea of the subject.

KJ said...

A sunbeam, a sunbeam
Jesus wants me for a sunbeam
A sunbeam, a sunbeam
I'll be a sunbeam for Him

Little Marcy

I See You!

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