Friday, March 28, 2008

Friday Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging: ANOTHER Evening Of Terrible Comedy: Easter Friday Edition


Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Sigh, all I do lately is hide from that dog! At least she's off napping somewhere right now.




Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Maybe I'll take a little nap right now, but I think I hear someone coming. Dang! It's that snooty bank!




Red Mr. Peanut Bank Good day and Happy Easter, Bunrab! How are you?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Hello, Red Mr. Peanut Bank. I'm fine, but a little tired.
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Have you lost weight?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House No, I just can't outrun Chompita. What's up?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Well, it's time for Friday Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging. You are featured this evening.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Oh, really! Rabbit jokes again?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank In a similar vein; Easter jokes tonight. I have a few to get things started.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Oh, Joy!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank What's that? Oh, never mind! Let me begin: Why did the Easter egg hide?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House I don't know. Why?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Because it was a little chicken. Heh, heh. Now, what do you call rabbits that marched in a long sweltering Easter parade?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House I have no idea!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Hot, cross bunnies. Oh, how droll! Now, how many Easter bunnies does it take to change a light bulb?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Surprise me!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank How many Easter bunnies can??? Oh my, that was certainly silly! Oh, look! It's Gallito Mescalito!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Great!



Red Mr. Peanut Bank Hello, Gallito Mescalito! Happy Easter to you!
Gallito Mescalito ¡Shriek!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House And Happy Easter to you, too, Gallito Mescalito! What brings you here?
Gallito Mescalito ¿Shriek?Shrieky-shriek.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the HouseWell, let's hear them. But, please, don't make me give answers or say "why?" or "I don't know, what?" okay?
Gallito Mescalito ¡Shriek! ¿Shriek-shrieky-shriek-shriekfrom this point on our Gallito to English translator is activated Q: What do you call a Easter ducky that just doesn't fit in?
A: Mallardjusted.
Q: What do you get when you cross a chicken and the Easter Bunny?
A: A good Easter.
Q: How do bunnies stay healthy?
A: Eggercise ¡Shrieeeeeek!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Hahahahaha! Very funny! I have a few for you!
Gallito Mescalito ¿Shriek?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?
Gallito Mescalito ¿Shriek?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Because the chicken had his Easter eggs! Okay, same question: Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?
Gallito Mescalito ¿Shriek?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House To prove he wasn’t chicken!hahahahahahahahaha! Here's the last one: What does a rooster say to a hen he likes?
Gallito Mescalito ¿Shriek?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House You're one hot chick! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
Gallito Mescalito ¡Shriek! ¿Shriek?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank I agree. What's so funny about that? Well, Good day, Bunrab!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Hasta luego.
Gallito Mescalito ¡Shriek!




Squeaky Gorilla Happy Easter, Bunrab! skeek I have some jokes for you.skeek
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Hello, Squeaky Gorilla. Well, let's hear 'em! But I'm not gonna ask why and stuff. Just tell the joke.
Squeaky Gorilla Very well. skeek Q: Where does Valentine's Day comes after Easter? skeek In the dictionary. Skeek
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Very funny.
Squeaky Gorilla Yes, indeed! skeek Q: Do you know how bunnies stay in shape? skeek A: Hareobics. skeek
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Please continue.
Squeaky Gorilla Q: What grows between your nose and chin? skeek
A: Tulips!!!!! skeek Tulips!!!!! skeek
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Ha ha. What is that noise?
Squeaky Gorilla What noise? skeek I don't hear any noise!skeek
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Okay. NEXT!!





¡El Toro! Hola, Bunrab! ¡Feliz Pascua!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Oh, hello, ¡El Toro! I suppose you have some jokes too?
¡El Toro! Sí, yo tengo, pero en inglés. Necisito a practicar.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Muy bién.
¡El Toro! ¡Bueno! Q: What is the end of Easter?
A: The letter R. Q: What do you get when you find a rabbit with no hair?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House No se.
¡El Toro! ¡A hairless hare! ¡Jijijijijiji! ¡Ciao!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Ai, gracias a Dios. Hasta luego, ¡El Toro!




Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Yo, Bunrab! Happy Eastah! How's it hanging?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House It's just barely hanging, Cat. That dog has been chewing on me something awful!
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy I tot yood lost weight! Ready ta heah sumptin' funny?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House As long as I don't have to say "why?" or "how?" or " I don't know, how many?"
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy No problem!I got's wunna dose Top Ten lists like on David Lettahmen! Wanna heah it?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Please! Go right ahead!
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Great! Dis is da Top Ten Reasons to Celebrate Eastah!
10. You absolutely loves da movie, "Da Ten Commandiments".
9. You look really, really good in yella.
8. You just went on a low cholesterol diet and din't wanna waste all dose eggs in da fridge.
7. You figga any Holiday what stahts wid a "Good Friday" can't be all bad.
6. You loves ta bite da heads off chocit bunnies.
5. It's a good time ta check out your neighborhood choich and not be noticeted.
4. You gots dis bunny suit you loves ta weah, but ah too insecure ta weah it wit'out a reason.
3. Even though ya don't know what it is, ya really likes da soun' a goin' ta a "Passion Play."
2. Ya figgured since Jesus went ta all DAT trouble ta make it to the foist Eastah, you'd gibbita shot.
1. As a Christian you celebrates da resurrection every other day, why not Eastah too? Funny, eh?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Very good, Cat. See ya 'round!
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Not if I sees ya foist! hahahahaha




Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Hey there, you big filthy bunny rabbit!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Oooh, Hello Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love! Happy Easter! Do you have some jokes, too?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love I sure do, you big soggy rag of a dog toy. Happy Easter to you, too. I've got a Top Ten List like the Cat.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Well, I can't wait to hear it! I'm all ears, as it were! Heh heh.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Very funny, big boy. Here are the Top Ten Signs that the Easter Bunny Is Nuts!
10. Neighbors describing him as "a quiet loner."
9. Removed from a department store last December after screaming at Santa, "You're going to die up there, fat man!"
8. Can't stop washing his paws.
7. Colorful eggs now filled with Prozac.
6. Apartment walls covered with photos of Sharon Stone.
5. Met with Dr. Kevorkian about the possibility of a "suicide egg."
4. Rotting corpse of Energizer bunny recently discovered in his crawl space.
3. Won't come out of his compound in Waco, Texas.
2. He's hippity-hopped up on crack.
1. Keeps rubbing himself for good luck.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House HAHAHAHAHA!!! THOSE WERE GREAT!!!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Yeah, okay, Bunrab, calm down. I gotta go. See ya!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Good bye, Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love. I love you!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Every body does!




¡El Penguino! Dude! Happy Easter!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Oh, Hi, ¡El Penguino! Happy Easter!
¡El Penguino! ¡Feliz Pascua to you, too! Ready for some jokes?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House As long as I don't have to say "why?" or "how?" or " I don't know, how many?"
¡El Penguino! No prob, Bob! Just listen to these: Good Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Easter.
Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Xmas.
Altzheimer's Advantage #2 :- You can hide your own Easter eggs.
Q. What do Easter Bunny helpers get for making a basket?
A. Two points, just like anyone else.
Q. What's invisible and smells like carrots?
A. The Ether Bunny
Q. Why did the Easter Bunny hide his eggs?
A. He doesn't want the other bunnies to know tht he was fooling around with the chickens. hahahahahaha.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Wow! I actually LIKED those! Thanks!
¡El Penguino! See ya around, dude! I'm feelin' mighty THIRSTY!!!!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Not if I see you first! heheheheh!
¡El Penguino! Dude! You stole that from the cat!




The Mighty Moose of Vermont Hello, Bunrab. Happy Easter to you!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Hello, Mighty Moose of Vermont. How's your first Easter in Panamá going?
The Mighty Moose of Vermont Quite nicely, thank you. I don't miss the friggin' cold of Vermont, and I really like that "bun and cheese" everyone eats from Good Friday through the rest of Easter. Thanks for asking! And how are you?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Well, I've been chosen to listen to Easter jokes. I suppose you have a few hidden in your antlers?
The Mighty Moose of Vermont I most certainly do! Ready? Here we go!
Q. What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar bill and a crazy rabbit?
A. One is bad money, the other is a mad bunny!
Q. How many Easter eggs can you put in an empty basket?
A. Only one – after that it’s not empty any more!
Q. What’s yellow, has long ears, and grows on trees?
A. The Easter Bunana!
Q. How do you catch the Easter Bunny?
A. Hide in a bush and make a noise like a carrot!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Thank you! Those were quite amusing!
The Mighty Moose of Vermont You're welcome! Now I must be off and find that penguin. He seems to have developed a taste for Panamanian Rum!




The Telly Tubbies Eh-oh, bunwab. Eh-oh, bunwab. How doing? How doing?Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Hello, Tellytubbies! Say, what happened to your wings?
The Telly Tubbies Shed da wings. Shed da wings. Gots jokes! Gots jokes!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Well, let's hear them!
The Telly Tubbies How dus Eastew en'? How dus Eastew en'?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House I don't know. How DOES Easter end?
The Telly Tubbies Wif da lettow R! Wif da lettow R! What you call a wabbit dat tells good jokes? A wabbit dat tells good jokes?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House I don't know. Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House?
The Telly Tubbies NO! A funny bunny! Funny Bunny! Not Bunwab!




Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Gee, I thought I was the funny bunny.
The Telly Tubbies Oh,Bunwab, Big hug! BIG HUG!!!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Thank you, Tellytubbies. Now, run away! Run away!
The Telly Tubbies Run away!Run Away!



Blurry Bear Hey, Rabbit! Q. Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?
A. Because the powder puff is on the other end!

Q. What did the rabbit say to the carrot?
A. It’s been nice gnawing you!
Q.How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
A.Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?
Q. Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the world?
A. Because it has four rabbit’s feet!
Q. What did the rabbits do after their wedding?
A. Went on their bunnymoon!
Q. Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
A. He was having a bad hare day!
Q. Why can’t a rabbit’s nose be 12 inches long?
A. Because then it would be a foot!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House STOP IT! STOP IT!! I CAN'T TAKE ANY MORE!!! AAAARRRGGGHHHH!!!
Blurry Bear Heh heh. I'm outta here!!!




Everybody, in one voice Oh Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House, thanks for being such a good sport. You know we love you!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Well, at least I've been safe from Chompita for a while.
Everybody, in one voice Happy Easter, Everyone! ¡Feliz Pascua a Todos! See you next week!
Gallito Mescalito ¡¡¡¡SSSHHHRRRRIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEKKKKKK!!!!

This post has been visited by the Alter Guild, thanks to Jane R.

7 comments:

Jane R said...

¡¡¡Groooooooooooaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnn!!!

P.S. Squeaky Gorilla: Very well. skeek Q: Where does Valentine's Day comes after Easter? skeek
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House: Very funny.


I tinks I missed sumpin'. 'splain pleez.

Anonymous said...

Me too, I read it three times then went nuts...I didn't gain on sanity until the finale.

That was a EPIC!

Happy Bunrab to ALL and to ALL a Good NIGHT!

Vivian Gilbertson de la Rosa

Jane R said...

Now I'm really confused :-).

susan s. said...

I thank you profusely for the jokes. Some were very funny. Oh Bunrab, I hope you get some rest!!!!

Paul said...

¡Feliz Pascua a todos los animalitos y juguetes en Panamá que nos divierten cada viernes! Ustedes me hacen reir. Abrazos a todos.

Mild disclaimer: there were some really awful jokes in there, so keep the day jobs, gang, but I luvs ya all nonetheless!

Padre Mickey said...

Ya gotsta put in lotsa bad jokes so that the occasional gem can shine through.

Caminante said...

Where in God's green acres or Panamanian palms do you find all these jokes??? Dios mio. Felices Pascuas y no es chiste :)

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